A little about NLP
There seems to be an infinite amount of info out there regarding NLP, or Neuro Linguistic Programming, (yes I know, it’s a mouthful). So many people try to explain how it works and what it is. I will do my very best to keep it as simple as possible.
I’ll also put some links to other sites, that I believe explain it well, (and much better than I could) and go more into the theory of NLP. I’m not really concerned with explaining what it is and how it works, I just know that the benefits and results are incredible and sometimes unbelievable.
I’m more focussed on giving people an experience of NLP, rather than an explanation!
I look at NLP as a type of user manual for your mind/brain. If we look at our brains as a type of computer, NLP is like software, or an instruction book that shows how our mind functions and how we can get it working for us. If you have old programmes or files on your computer, you upgrade from time to time, delete the old files and replace with new… NLP helps to delete the programmes from your mind that are not serving you well (Limiting beliefs, Fear, Anxiety, Stress, Worry and so on..) and replace them with new ones. (Beliefs that serve you well, Confidence, Motivation, Happiness, Joy and so on..)
Let’s take something simple. If, for example, you had something coming up in the future (an exam, interview, date or meeting) and every time you ‘thought’ about it you ‘felt’ anxious or nervous, your program is faulty, your ‘thinking’ about it is causing something in your body (feeling and emotions) to overreact. Learning a few very simple NLP techniques will allow you to feel calm, relaxed and confident when ‘thinking’ about that upcoming situation… Sounds simple eh?…
That’s because it is!.
Peter was an 84 year old Eastern European man who had lived in England since the 2nd world war. He had fought alongside the British in Italy, after escaping from his country when the Nazi’s invaded.
He came to see me because he’d been having anxiety attacks and bouts of jealousy for the 3 months previous.
After the initial telephone conversation, I felt confident that one session would be enough, and I told him so.
You see, his wife had an affair in the Fifties for 2 years. The affair ended and they got on with their life. Peter told me that it took him a couple of years to get over it and he never thought about it again… until last year.
Now, I could have gone down a number of different avenues to help, but I’ve built a good reputation for getting fast results.
When he was telling me the story of the affair, he was in tears and feeling much ‘heartache’, (remember, this is 50 Years after). I could see that he was seeing pictures in his mind as he was telling me. I asked him if they were always the same pictures and he said yes.
So, for the last 3 months, every time he was ‘thinking’ about his wife, he was ‘creating’ a make believe picture in his mind of her and her lover, together, making love, which, in turn, gave him feelings of anger, jealousy and ‘pain’. Think about it, he hadn’t ‘thought’ about it for 50 years, and now, it came flooding back.
There was a time, before I learned about NLP, that I would go into the ‘why’ and reasons for these thoughts to come back, and that’s the beauty of NLP, we don’t need to know, and the client doesn’t need to know ‘why’, or sometimes they do, in which case, I’ll refer them to a psychotherapist, (that could be a long process).
Anyway, for some reason, Peter’s emotions had resurfaced. After telling me that he dearly loved his wife, he just wanted to get back to ‘normal’ and it was actually her that persuaded him to come and see me because she had had enough of his bad temper.
Once I knew that Peter was making the pictures; I went to work with a very simple NLP technique (which I will share with you in my Newsletter).
The whole technique/intervention took about 15 minutes. After the technique was completed, I asked him to now ‘think’ about his wife. First, there was a confused look on his face, (which is very normal). Then, a smile appeared, then he looked at me and asked how it was possible, (I love that moment). It was still possible for Peter to remember the affair, (NLP doesn’t take your memory away) but it was impossible for him to get the ‘bad’ feelings back when he was ‘thinking’ about it. And, now, he was only having good ‘thoughts and feelings’
I’ve since met Peter’s wife, needless to say, she was very happy to meet me. I’ve kept in contact and all is well.
I consider learning about how my mind works with NLP to be one of the best investments I ever made. I will always be thankful and grateful that I was introduced to it, or rather, stumbled across it. My big hope is that I’ve opened a little door for you and it’s encouraged you to go in and have a look around. Life get’s exciting and thing’s happen when we step outside our comfort zones and start breaking down some of the beliefs we have about ourselves and the world.
I hope you’ve enjoyed reading.